| June 23, 2003 |
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May 12th, 2009 @ 6:51pm
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Wow, um... thank you guys so much for all of the birthday gifts. Again, it means a lot and I really wasn't expecting anything at all. I didn't even realize that anyone knew when my birthday was other than Mar. My room is filled with flowers right now and I don't know what I'm going to do with all of this stuff. But seriously, thank you all so much.
I went to visit Laney yesterday and Saturday, and that was a lot of fun. I haven't left Great Britain/Ireland since... well I don't think I've left ever since I moved back when Marcus came to get me. Both Holland and France were beautiful, and it was even better to be there with such a good friend.
Anyway, I've got to start getting ready for tonight. I really wish that Miles could... would? come with me I guess I don't deser I wish Marcus was here, too. It's going to be a lot of fun, knowing the rest of Puddlemere.
[Private to Self]
Ugh! I need to just let it go! I did it to myself... I hurt him so badly and yet I somehow wish or want or think he would/should talk to me? It all happened so fast... I fell for him so fast. Why can't I just forget about him...?
I have to clean myself up before they get here and I ruin the night.
[/Private to Self]
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September 13th, 2008 @ 11:14pm
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I'm excited for the European League season to start up; Oliver has certainly been training us hard and we're working together better than ever. I don't really feel like my heart is completely in it, though. It's hard to concentrate on a game when there's so much else going on outside of the league. So much sadness and despair. I'll try to keep my chin up and not be too depressing, heh.
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| May 28th, 2003 |
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March 10th, 2008 @ 2:46pm
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It felt good to go over there and help out. With almost the entire Order so many people going to help out a lot of people were found. Not to say that it wasn't dirty work, because it was, and there were a lot of bodies found, but those poor people that were in there... I'm proud to be part of the effort to help.
It was a little scary at times, especially when parts of the building would start to collapse more, or when a random creature came from nowhere, but in the end it was so worth it. I even laughed a little at how loud my group screamed when that spider came flying towards us. I haven't laughed at all in a long time that hard for awhile. It was just one of those moments where you can't help but laugh, despite the situation that everyone is in. Even found a few people that we knew.
I'm so glad. I just wish that we could speed up the process and get to those who are suffering in there faster.
I don't even care if it's a Death Eater we pull out. No one deserves to starve to death or suffocate, or any of that. There's good in everyone, they say. Especially in those who don't see it in themselves. I believe it.
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February 28th, 2008 @ 4:39pm
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[Hexed Against Loyal Death Eaters/Death Eater Supporters]
It's like the world is falling apart. First the arrest and now... this? I can't even stand up right now, how pathetic is that? My heart head hurts so bad... just thinking about what everyone inside is going through, and how many people didn't...make it.
Is there nothing sane in this world? Is there nothing we can turn to for refuge? I'm so scared.
[Private; could be broken by Angie/Emma]
I'm so scared. I don't know what to do and think, and I want to know if Miles is safe... and if Marcus was tied up somewhere when it happened. Is he stuck in there? Are both of them? There's nothing left of my heart to break.
He hates me, but I have to know
[/Private]
[Private to Miles]
God, I hope you are alright. You don't have to say anything other than yes or no. I just need to know if you're safe.
[/Private]
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November 29th, 2007 @ 5:48pm
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[Private to Self]
What can I say to that? There's nothing that I can say that can make him hurt less, or feel better about himself. Approaching him would just make things worse, make him remember even more freshly what happened and what I did. I tore him up! I did. I ran away to protect myself; but what good did that really do? I've caused more pain for everyone than done any good. Cliff kept telling me that I made the right choice, but Cliff wasn't there! He didn't see the look in his eyes. Cliff doesn't understand... I hurt both of them; the two men in my life that I always knew I could trust, no matter what! And over what? Their political alliance. It's huge, I know it's huge, but I can't just accept that it was a reasonable reason to leave! Death Eaters or not, I knew that I could trust them; I still know that I can trust them. I trust both of them with my life... and my heart.
But I took that away from them! I took my heart from him when he needed me the most. How selfish I've become... to think that it would be better apart from him. I could be there for him now; assuring him that he's done something amazing in this world at least for one person.
He did for me. He showed me that I can be loved and love in return; and for that I can't even begin to repay him. He doesn't see what he did for me; he doesn't understand that he changed my life forever.
I left my heart with him that night... and I can't seem to put everything back together anymore.
[/End]
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| May 3rd, 2003 [after meeting with Katie] |
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October 29th, 2007 @ 6:10pm
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[Hexed Against loyal DE/Supporters]
I went and spoke to Arthur Weasley like George, Oliver, and Ginny recommended I do. He's a great guy; very friendly. I was slightly nervous, but he made it seem like it happened every day to him. I'm still waiting to hear back about their decision, but at least I went and asked if I could help. I've done everything that I can; now it's up to them.
Also hanging out with Katie was a good time. I really think that we need to do that more. I need to see more of all of you guys on the team outside of practice. Get to know each other more. Heaven knows I've been rather reserved since I joined. Especially after January.
But I've got to run. Angelina wants to talk and I don't want to make her wait.
Cho? Oliver? Katie? Everyone else? Let's do something soon. Celebrate.
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October 18th, 2007 @ 5:30pm
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That truly was a brilliant game, wasn't it? And I'll be the first to admit that when Sean Vaisey walked out onto the pitch with his face rather bruised and puffy, I laughed. Just a little bit. I wonder what happened to him?
Congratulations, you guys! We're so close to Finals! I can't wait!
[Hexed To Order Members/Ministry & Order Supporters]
I don't really know what I'm going to do if something happens to Miles or Marcus. Every day you can see it, the changes that are beginning to take place. I've never even been here during a war but I know something is coming. It's frightening, but all the same I know that I have to help do something. I spoke to Cliff about the Order and he's told me that it can be dangerous. But what's a few risks in life, you know? I know what I believe in, but I can't do anything on my own. My heart breaks knowing who I'll be putting myself against, but it's either that or do nothing. And I'm going to do something.
Who do I go to?
[/Hex]
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September 24th, 2007 @ 12:54pm
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[Hexed Against Death Eaters/Supporters]
God, Katie, I cant believe this. I am so sick of all of this. How it affects everyone like this. None of us deserve this, no matter what they think. No one deserves to be threatened, or hurt over something so ridiculous.
I want to help. Someone, what do I need to do? I am not sitting around anymore and just being someone that is in the way and needing the help. I have been a victim of all of this madness before and I will not be one again without at least helping to fight against it.
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September 6th, 2007 @ 5:36pm
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Alright, I know that this is completely spontaneous, but after all of the recent publicity that Puddlemere has been getting, I decided to do something drastic. I've dyed my hair blonde... with the help of Laney, who I'm pretty sure wasn't too fond of the idea to begin with. So we'll see how well this all works out.
I think I needed a change too, not just to hide away from paparazzi, but... just a difference in my life. I'm tired of disappointment and grieving Maybe to help me move on, or something to that effect. I don't think that moving on is quite as easy as dying ones hair, but at least it gives me something else to think about.
Laney, Cliff, I think that we should all go out one night. What do you think? Go and have dinner somewhere and just enjoy ourseves. Heaven knows that the both of you need a break, and with all of these practices, so do I.
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